Iranian Beluga, Malossol

Harvested from the southern Caspian, cured in the old Iranian style with the lightest possible salt — malossol, "little salt." Buttery, oceanic, and finished with a mineral snap. The house tradition since the clan's earliest LAN nights, when someone brought a tin as a joke and nobody ever let it go.

$1,200 / 50g tin

Allocation: 7 tins remaining this cycle

OriginCaspian Sea, Iran
CureMalossol, hand-salted
GrainLarge, silver-grey
PairingMother-of-pearl spoon, chilled vodka, comms silence
Origin storyA LaVi$h in-joke since 2017

Reserve a Tin

This is a bit. LaVi$h Provisions is an inside joke of the LaVi$h Counter-Strike 2 clan and does not sell, ship, or broker actual caviar, sanctioned or otherwise. No payment is collected. Reservations are logged for comedic posterity only. Please don't email us about import regulations — we know.

Reserve Your Allocation

Claim a Tin (Not Really)

No money changes hands. Your name goes on the list, and the list means everything.